Fear is how i fall

I'm afraid.....

I'm afraid now. Afraid of so many things. Afraid of the future, afraid of people, afraid of challenge, afraid of change, afraid of myself. Things are never the way i plan it....for some reason it always have to backfire. Call me a poor planner, call me a jinx, but fuck i'm getting pissed about it.

I have 2 fucking assignments to pass up by next week and i have the slightest clue on how to do it. Clock is ticking, but the gears just aint moving. Fuck, now what. Oh i know, i'll just ask some of my coursemates on how to do this. It shouldn't be too tough doing this together right? Oh wait....what was that? You all went to the library to borrow some books? What the fuck, you all didn't even tell me about this? Ohhh....and what was that again....you all want me to do this MYSELF?!?! Ok....ok. Sure no problem. After all i've done for you i guess that my effort now was all worthless in the past. Just a simple coorperation to do an assignment together is a no to you eh? Wait....is it because this thing is a self assignment thingie? Cannot be so kiasu right? Oh wait....you are. Bitch...........

The perfect recipe for FEAR. First of all....make sure that all your friends abandon you. You feel lonely, pathetic, down and like a loser. Next, you try to be a fucking hero by taking too many subjects in college. It goes fine at first....until you realised that you have so much to study that you are fucked. Then, sprinkle a little bit of betrayl, everyone around you just seem to turn their backs on you when you need them the most. This recipe sounds so fucking familar to all right? Haha i'm sure everyone prepared this before. And lastly, for presentation and dressing, bring in the assignments and exams that you will have to combat all alone while everyone is easily working together solving it. Violla!!! The perfect recipe for FEAR.

Anyway shouldn't be too negative about this. Guess i'm just a little too stressed and paranoid. But seriously, with this continuing on and on....let's just hope my fear wont be the reason i fall.